After spending 12 weeks what felt like my new dysfunctional family it gave me an insight into people that is normally only ever experienced in a channel 4 documentary.

Who is the best footballer?

On paper this team have some very good footballers, unfortunately on grass not quite as good.

Chris Hanson, ladies’ favourite is well known for his tackle and Baby Face Ryan Ambler is known as King of the dribble but for me the best player must be James Sharp. Looks like a footballer, talks like a footballer and moans like a footballer.

Who is the most intelligent in the team?

The Commercial Legends aren’t blessed with intelligence which is a shame. For example Daz Laverick once went out for a pizza with his wife and when the waitress said “Do you want it cutting into 4 or 8?” he answered 4 because he couldn’t manage 8! Matt Kerley shows what you can do when you focus, Matt was always a slow starter at school and wasn’t like other nursery school kids, he was 11. But now he is a banker so it worked out all ok.

So in light of the tight competition and even though he hides it the best I would say the most intelligent in Shane Young!

Who is the joker of the team?

The Commercial Legends changing room is a like an Aldi version of Live at the Apollo with most jostling for attention in the humour stakes. Unfortunately like the crossbar challenge most fall short. If I had to pick someone though it would be Jordan McReynolds as you just can’t shut him with his one liners!

Who would you least like to be stuck in a lift with?

If you had of asked me this a month ago it would have been Gaz Walton as I understand oxygen and space are valuable commodities in a lift however unfortunately Gaz suffered an injury when eating a Chinese so cannot play. We wish Mr Lee a speedy recovery.

Who is the unsung hero?

Must be Jon Mimms, sneaks into training in his Tesla, makes out goalkeeper isn’t his number 1 position yet pulls off save after save. In the last friendly he pulled off almost as many saves as he has gained parking tickets so well done Jon!

Who is the dressing room DJ?

Very questionable music tastes this team but the king of the boombox must be Dom Gibbs. His Caged Steel experience of knowing what to go into the ring to so tonight if you hear Right Said Fred and Culture Club then that’s the Legends Changing Room

Who is the quickest player on the team?

Jordan McReynolds gets another mention here, not a lot of competition to be fair, but he is twice as quick as the others which is a good job really as when he sets off, he normally has to go back for the ball but still gets there first!

Who is the best finisher in the team?

Oliver Temperton definitely, he finished 12 doughnuts from Asda before the last friendly and didn’t affect his performance at all. Was still bang average

Who could be the game changer?

The older Temperton brother Josh bags this one, he changed the game last year when he conceded a last-minute penalty. He will be hoping for better things this year and putting his giant forehead on the ball to head the winning goal from a corner.

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